Having an identity crisis? Here's what to do.
Identity Crisis
What is an identity crisis? First, we need to understand the concept of identity.
Identity involves central beliefs about who you are. This goes far beyond personality traits. Many facets of life shape your identity. These influences include gender, occupation, social class, and relationships to name a few.
Identity is also determined by characteristics, behaviours, and groups we associate ourselves with. We all have different roles in life (e.g., teacher, parent, friend), and there are different types of identity (e.g., social, personal (1). Identity is also comprised of subjective beliefs about who you think you are (2). The way we think about and describe these representations is fundamental to our self-image and the story of our lives.
Both individual and external forces influence identity (e.g., government organisations, major illness or disability) and can exist at the individual, relational, or collective level (3). Thus, 'you' in the 'Who are you?' question can refer to individuals, couples, or groups. This collective identity is the process by which people describe themselves as part of a broader group (4).
In Crisis
An identity crisis is not a medical or diagnosable mental health condition. We trace this expression back to psychoanalyst Erik Erikson. According to him, identity crisis is part of growing up, or 'normative'. The identity crisis is one of several stages of psychosocial development.
However, people can experience uncertainty, confusion and/or major changes in identity at any time in their lives (e.g., a ‘midlife crisis’). People question their sense of self and place in the world during an identity crisis. Major life events often result in changes to your social roles and identity (5, 6). These events can trigger an identity crisis. However, any major life event (positive and negative) can generate questions about identity.
There are no official signs or symptoms of an identity crisis. However, you may experience any of the following:
Uncertainty about your 'true' personality.
A sense of not knowing who you are.
Difficulties clarifying values or what's important to you.
Uncertainty about goals and life direction.
While uncertainties about identity can be very unsettling, most people don't go into an actual crisis. A more accurate term is typically 'identity uncertainty’ or ‘role confusion'.
Loss of Identity
Lossing a sense of identity is when someone losses connection with who they are. Most tend to describe a sense of confusion or uncertainty when I talk to people in this situation. We often use this expression as an alternative to identity crisis.
Diffused Identity
We expect young people to have an identity crisis but gradually work out who they are. Identity diffusion is when this process remains unresolved. This outcome is thought to generate some significant psychological issues (7).
Be Aware
Identity crisis and confusion may occur before or during more serious forms of psychological distress. Look out for health issues like depression and anxiety in particular. But also be aware of the following:
Sleep disturbance
Change in appetite
Increased irritability, or other negative feelings
Low motivation
Poor concentration, attention and/or memory
Negative thoughts towards yourself (e.g., 'I am a failure')
Dwelling on recent difficult life events
Problems identifying goals and/or what's important to you
You may want to seek additional help if any of the above issues occur alongside an identity crisis.
What Can I Do About An Identity Crisis?
There is no 'one size fits all' approach when experiencing an identity crisis. We can take several options to resolve identity crises. You don’t have to rush to a mental health professional.
Here are a few suggested strategies:
Clarify core values. Identifying values provides a roadmap for decision-making and actions. This guidance helps with identity development
Put identity issues in context. It is totally normal to question your identity throughout life. Sometimes, an identity crisis results from catastrophising during uncertainty and confusion. Identity issues can actually be a positive experience if we see opportunities to take stock of our lives.
Take a 'self-as-context' approach to identity. It's ok to see yourself as someone who changes depending on the situation. In fact, problems like low self-esteem can arise from a fixed identity. Think of being the chessboard rather than the pieces. Watch the video discussing the stage show metaphor.
We are Coaching & Clinical Psychologists with extensive experience helping people conquer a range of wellbeing and performance issues at home and in the workplace. We can also help with an identity crisis. Read more about our work, watch practical skills videos or browse other articles. Get in touch anytime.
References
(1) Levine, C. (2003). Introduction: Structure, development, and identity formation. Identity: An International Journal of Theory and Research, 3(3), 191-195. doi: 10.1207/S1532706XID0303_01
(2) Vignoles, V. L., Schwartz, S. J., & Luyckx, K. (2011). Introduction: Toward an integrative view of identity. In S. J. Schwartz, K. Luyckx, & V. L. Vignoles (Eds.), Handbook of Identity Theory and research (pp. 1-27). New York: Springer.
(3) Sedikides, C., & Brewer, M. B. (2001). Individual, relational, and collective self: partners, opponents, or strangers? In C. Sedikides & M. B. Brewer (Eds.), Individual self, relational self, collective self (pp. 1–4). Philadelphia: Psychology.
(4) Orzeck, P. (2016). Identities in transition: Women caregivers in bereavement. Journal of Social Work in End-of-Life & Palliative Care. 12(1-2), 145-161. doi: 10.1080/15524256.2016.1165162
(5) Banaji, M. R., & Prentice, D. A. (1994). The self in social contexts. Annual Review of Psychology, 45, 297-332.
(6) Burke, P. J. (2006). Identity change. Social Psychology Quarterly, 69(1), 81-96. doi: 10.1177/019027250606900106
(7) Rivnyák, A., Pohárnok, M., Péley, B., & Láng, A. (2021). Identity diffusion as the organising principle or borderline personality traits in adolescents: A non-clinical study. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 12. DOI=10.3389/fpsyt.2021.683288
